Let all Who Take Refuge in You Sing for Joy...

Last night, I spent some time going through the Psalms, noting passages that refer to God as a high tower, shelter or refuge... hiding us under the shadow of his wings until the storm passes.

Knowing that I was struggling with fear, I wanted to fill my heart and mind with reassurances from scripture that God is a "very present help in times of trouble" and that when I'm weak - his grace strengthens me and is sufficient for my specific needs.  I wanted to have God's word in my heart as I slept and to have it in my mind to draw from the next day when I knew that I would need it to battle the fear and anxiety I was experiencing.

We woke up early this morning and left the house while it was still dark and drove to Los Angeles for our 7am check in.  We got to the hospital, was admitted and got settled into the prep room where I was able to speak with the interventional radiologist who was going to do the procedure.  He went over how he was going to do the biopsy and covered all the risks and possible negative outcomes.

He said that he would need to take some initial CT scans to get a read on where the nodules were and then decide which lung to biopsy and which angle to use.

The nurse wheeled me into the CT room, transferred me to the CT table and hooked me up to an IV, oxygen, several electrodes, a blood pressure cuff, and a pulse oximeter - so many wires and tubes!

The doctor took a few scans and then, after consulting with my pulmonologist, came back to me to tell me that he wasn't going to do the biopsy!

He told me that both the mass in one lung and the nodule in the other were not only smaller, but "significantly smaller" than they were earlier this month on my first CT scans.  He said that he didn't think the risk and trauma of going through the biopsy was worth it - and "didn't want to put me through that."

He assured me that the nodule/mass were not cancer but due to inflammation and consistent with Wegener's.  When I asked him if the rheumatologist needed the biopsy information to make an accurate diagnosis, he said that she had enough lab results to confirm it.

Then, the nurse came back and we did everything in reverse: she unhooked me from all the tubes and wires and wheeled me back to the prep room - I got dressed and was free to go!

Just a quick example of how God met me this morning:  when I woke up, I took my pulse / blood pressure and my resting pulse was 127 - very high!  And for a couple hours before getting admitted, I could feel a panic attack lurking under the surface. During our hour in the waiting room, I rehearsed the scriptures I had been meditating on last night and prayed.  When I got to the prep room, my heart rate was 111 - still high, but much better.  As I was on the CT table hooked up to all the tubes and wires - my heart rate went down to 79.  Proof that God gives us what we need when we need it. He was so gracious and merciful to give me peace at the most fearful and critical time!

I am so thankful for all my family and friends who have cared for me and prayed with me!  I really have felt carried and strengthened by your prayers and feel God's grace covering me.  And I am grateful to God who intervened on my behalf and gave me more than I could even think or ask!